


Stop crying to the ocean

by Ohpthereitis



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Relationship, Sales rep Clarke, Unplanned Pregnancy, Writer Lexa (The 100), clexa baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:48:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27320719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ohpthereitis/pseuds/Ohpthereitis
Summary: Clarke works in an art supply store, Lexa is an author who writes mystery novels. The two get to know each other, facing difficulties along the way, while developing a strong bond over someone very special.
Relationships: Abby Griffin/Marcus Kane, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Clexa - Relationship, Monty Green/Harper McIntyre, Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Comments: 16
Kudos: 67





	1. I've got a cure, I've got the cure for you

**Author's Note:**

> This might be a bit of a difficult read at first, I haven't written anything in nearly 10 years but i'm hoping that as the story progresses my writing style and comfortably will come back, so hang in there if you can!

BEEP  BEEP BEEP BEEP blares the alarm clock on the bedside table.  _ 6:00 AM is too early to force anyone to get up _ , thinks Clarke. Grudgingly pulling herself out of bed she turns the alarm off and heads for the shower,  _ another exciting day of stocking shelves at the art supply store, _ she thinks sarcastically. As she trudges into the bathroom, she flips on the shower and steps in, being hit with a shock of icy water.

“RAVEN, YOU USED ALL OF THE HOT WATER AGAIN, DAMMIT” she yells in the direction of her roommate and  best friends ’ bedroom. _ Looks like it’s a dry shampoo day after all. _

After fixing her hair and tossing on her work uniform she makes her way downstairs to the kitchen where Raven is sitting at the small table, nibbling on her breakfast. 

“Here, I made coffee that could wake the dead it's so strong. And it looks like you might need it.” Raven says as she slides Clark a huge mug of hot muddy coffee.

“Thanks, you’re so sweet,” Clark rolls her eyes and plops down at the table across from her. “ Im heading in to open today, give me a ride?” Seeing raven  nod a confirmation the two girls finish their breakfast and head out of the small apartment, on their way to start their day. 

_ 8:00am _ , Clarke checks her watch.  _ This job seems to be getting very stale to say the least _ , she thinks as she prices and places packages of  watercolour paints on a shelf. Price, place, price, place. Over and over, the only change being the items that she works on. The day continues to drag, and by the time her lunch break rolls around Clarke wears price tag stickers on her arms, and one smack dab in the middle of her forehead. The tag reads 10.99$,  _ what a deal. _

“Uh, think you got a little carried away  there Kiddo” says Raven, as they walk into the break room together. “If you’re so bored of stocking why don’t you ask to be switched to cash or something, it might make the day pass quicker,  add some variety.”

Clark opens the breakroom fridge and pulls out her lunch bag, filled with cold pizza and a can of pop.  _ Bone Apple Teeth, _ she thinks to herself. “Because  its still here,  its still the same building. Cashing out strangers won't make the day more interesting. I need to look for something else I think.”

Taking a thermos of coffee out of her bag, Raven levels Clarke with a look. “Well, after break come take over my cash, just for a few customers. See how you like it, then you can decide if you want to find another job.”

“fine,” she says as she eats her oh so carefully packed  gourmet lunch. 

After checking out 3 or so customers, Clarke begins to brighten up, not particularly excited about the job, but feeling better that she is doing something with a little more variation. Speaking to customers adds a bit of fun to the shift, rather than only helping someone when they  can't find the pastels that were  _ right  _ _ infront _ _ of their face.  _ More than just price, place, price, place. After another few customers come through her cash, she convinces Raven to let her stay on for the rest of the shift. T-2 hours. 

Just before getting ready to shut the till down and cash out, one last customer comes through. Dropping an armload of stuff on the counter, Clark is able to take in the woman standing in front of her. Long wavy chestnut brown hair, slim athletic build, striking green eyes.  _ Wow, _ she thinks, quickly feeling awkward. 

“Find everything you were looking for?” She asks the woman,

“Yes, I think more than I was looking for.” She gives Clarke a small smile, taking her debit card out of her pocket. 

Clarke scans and bags the items as quickly as she can, telling the woman her total and accepting the payment, “Come again, we’d love to have you,” she says with a smile, handing her the items, feeling suddenly like she has overdone her politeness.

“Oh, I'm sure I  will .” She takes her bags and is gone before Clarke can muster the courage to look up from the cash register. 

On their drive home from work, Clarke mentions the last customer she had. “That has to be the most attractive woman that I’ve seen come into the store, probably ever.”

“You’re just saying that because you just broke up with Finn a week ago and you’re lonely,” Raven says with a laugh as she pulls into her parking spot outside of their apartment. “I’m sure she wasn’t that great, Griff.”

_ Maybe Raven was right _ , Clarke thinks as she washes off the work day in shower later that evening. Maybe I’m lonelier after Finn than I thought. Even though the two had only been together for a few months, Clark and Finn had known each other almost their whole lives. Their families lived on the same block and they went to school together from JK until college. He had been a pretty permanent fixture in her life, she had never gone so long as a few days without at least a text and now it has been a whole week without a single word. She didn’t mind, he broke her trust and once someone broke Clarkes trust, it was not usually given back, but it still felt weird to not talk to him. 

She spent the night lying in bed reading, trying to ignore the feeling of missing Finn. Sleep hadn’t helped that very much, as her ridiculous dreams brought him up again and again in the strangest of situations. In one scenario, they were teenagers and landed in a spaceship in the middle of the forest. In another, Finn broke her heart and slept with Raven. By morning she was exhausted, feeling somehow less rested than before.

The week carried on, and Raven and Clarke continued to split their shifts, switching positions after their lunch break and taking up each other's jobs. 3 days later, on Friday afternoon while Clarke was on cash again, the attractive green-eyed woman walked up, carrying another arm load of supplies. 

“Hello again,” She said after she  deposited all of the items onto the counter. “Told you I’d be back.”

Clarkes stomach swooped as she saw the woman smile at her, ever so crookedly. “Hey, yeah you did,” she said, once again feeling  awkward and out of place. She couldn’t remember the last time she had such a hard time talking to someone she found attractive, it was not like her to clam up. 

“Have you worked here long?”, the woman asked as Clarke rang up and bagged the items. 

Fumbling  slightly for words, “Uh, yeah. Over a year, now that I think about it. I don’t think I’ve seen you in here before last week.” Clarke manages to spit out. 

“That’s long enough. No, I recently decided to make my own cover art. I write mystery novels.  Lets just say I’m a much better  writer than artist.” She laughs and gives Clarke a cheeky grin. “My names Lexa.”

“I’m Clarke, that sounds like a more interesting job than this, I’m sure”. She finishes bagging Lexa’s items and holds the bag out to her, smiling back as confidently as she can.

“I don’t want to seem to forward but, I was wondering if you wanted to come  get a coffee with me after your shift,” asks Lexa, setting her bag down on the ground and pulling her phone out of the back pocket of her jeans.

“Oh, uh. Yeah, that would be great,” taking the phone Lexa hands her, she enters her number and saves herself as a contact. “I’m done at 5 today. Send me a text with where you want to meet,” 

As Lexa walked out of the store, Clark couldn’t help but blush and check her phone. 


	2. I'm half way there watching northshore from the floor, singing to you over my shoulder

“She asked me out for coffee, do you think that she meant it as a date or like, ‘hey I really like coffee, you probably won't murder me and I'm bored.’” Clarke asks Raven a while later as they're getting ready to leave work for the weekend. “I can never tell if someone is flirting with me,”

Raven laughs and slips on her jacket, “Well, I don’t ask random people for coffee unless I'm interested but that’s just me. Why don’t you just go, keep a level head and see what she wants. I’m sure it will be obvious once you two are sitting alone,” 

After grabbing her bag and jacket, Clarke feels her phone vibrate.

Unkown : Hey, its Lexa. Are you still up for coffee?

Clarke: Hey, yeah for sure. Where are you thinking?

Lexa: how about that place on the corner of Hammond and third, it seems  relatively quiet and the coffee  isn't too bad. 

Clarke: Ok sounds good, I’ll be there in 15.

With that, Clarke walks the few blocks to the coffee shop and spots Lexa sitting inside at a small table in the corner. She takes a few deep breaths, trying to steady herself and fight off the anxiety of sitting with this  _ very _ attractive stranger. Hearing the opening of the door, Lexa looks up from her phone and smiles the same cheeky smile as earlier. 

“You made it,” she says, watching Clarke as she sits down across from her. “I’m glad. I was worried I might have frightened you off, asking you to come for coffee so quickly,”

Clarke laughs a small awkward laugh, “No, not frightened. Curious though, if I'm being honest,” 

Just then the waitress comes up to take their order, Lexa ordering a double espresso and Clarke a  French vanilla. 

“Well, I’m not usually so forward but I figured I’d shoot my shot. The worst you could say was no,” taking a sip of her coffee and tilting her head slightly, “I don’t make it a habit to ask out strangers, but I liked how awkward you were,” 

_ How awkward I was, great,  _ Clarke thinks. “Well, I don’t make a habit of accepting strangers offers, but here we are,” she says with a smile. “So, how long have you been writing?”

The coffee date lasted 2 hours and 2 coffees each. Clarke learned that Lexa was 27, lived just outside of town and has been writing since she was in  high school , having her first novel published when she was 22. She had an Irish Wolfhound named Basil and spent most of her free time outside camping, hiking, fishing and  ATVing . Clarke told Lexa about living with her best friend, working at the art supply store, and the volunteer hours she does down at the county hospital. She couldn’t help but feel boring compared to Lexa, but everything she said Lexa had acted interested in and asked questions about. By the end of the date Lexa had asked Clarke out to her house the next evening for dinner and a fire, and Clarke willingly accepted. 

By the time she got home, Clarke was giddy. She bounded into the  livingroom smiling from ear to ear. “ She's so cool, Raven. I know that sounds stupid, but it's true. She’s a writer and has this big dog and lives outside of town. She invited me over for dinner and a fire tomorrow night, hey why are you laughing?”

Raven was sprawled out on the couch watching tv, munching on a bag of chips. “Nothing, nothing. I’m glad it went well, just be careful. You don’t know this woman and you just got out of a relationship. Take it easy is all I mean, don’t have too high of expectations”

Later that evening while Clarke was in bed watching a movie her phone buzzed

Lexa: Hey, I’m thinking I will pick you up tomorrow around 4:00, how does that sound

Clarke: That sounds great, should I bring anything?

Lexa: Just some warm clothes, it’s supposed to be chilly after. Send me your address in the morning. I’ll see you then. Goodnight, Clarke. 

Clarke: ok, Night! 

Clarke spent the next day feeling antsy, she didn’t know what to expect with the  evenings plans. Would it be awkward? Would Lexa get bored of her? All she knew was that she really wanted to see her again. After waking late, taking a long bath, drawing out the process of making lunch and eating, there was nothing left to do but pick out an outfit and get ready.  _ Why am I so nervous?  _ She thought as she rummaged through her closet.

2 outfits later, Clarke was ready and standing at the front door. She had on a pair of jeans, mid-calf boots, and a grey hoodie, deciding to carry her jacket as it was still relatively warm out. Checking her watch, she saw it was 3:55pm. 5 minutes. She could wait 5 minutes but her nerves got the best of her and she went to stand on the front stoop. Lexa was already there, waiting in Ravens parking spot in a black SUV. The smile on her face made Clarkes breath hitch. 

“Sorry, I'm a bit early,” Lexa said as Clarke got into the passenger seat. “Now, it’s a bit of a drive and I don’t know what you like to listen to, so here. You can be DJ” 

Clarke took Lexa’s phone as she handed it to her and searched through her music app, finding some bands she actually liked in the downloaded files. After settling on a song, Clarke hit play and Lexa turned to her and smiled,

“You like The Beaches? I’ve honestly never had anyone other than myself play them,” She turned the stereo up as Clarke nodded and smiled, the song  _ Desdemona _ playing through the vehicle. 

It took about a half hour to reach Lexa’s house and while they  drove she pointed out different spots and houses and told stories she had about them. One large house belonged to her cousin Lincoln and his wife, Lexa’s best friend, Octavia. While passing a park and picnic area Lexa told a story about Octavia taking both of their dogs for a walk and getting pulled down the length of the field when the mutts spotted a squirrel 50 feet off. After turning off of the highway and onto a winding dirt road, Lexa said they were nearing her house.

“Please don’t mind the dog, he’s usually good mannered, but he is huge so people tend to be scared of him.” Lexa warned as they pulled into the yard.

Lexa’s house was an old red brick Victorian, with a beautiful wrap around porch, balcony off of the second level and a large exquisitely manicured lawn surrounded by trees. How could someone live here all alone, Clarke thought. 

Getting out of the car, Lexa brought her fingers to her lips and let out a loud whistle. Off in the distance Clarke could hear an answering bark and not long after a huge black dog came bounding around the far side of the house, crossing the lawn and stopping  in front of Lexa, tail wagging. 

“Hi, Basil!” She said as she scratched his ears and loved on him, “come here Clarke, come say hello to my boy,” 

Clarke walked over slowly and put her hand out for Basil to sniff, after a quick second she was rewarded with a slobbery lick to her palm and she gave him a few gentile pats on head. “Hello, Basil” 

Basil reached the front door before the women did, “boofing” as if to tell Lexa to hurry up. Once inside he went straight to his dish in the kitchen and brought it over to Lexa, dropping it at her feet. 

“I’ve got to feed him or he’ll never settle down, make yourself at home,” she said and went off with Basil at her heels in search of kibble. 

The inside of the house was even more impressive than the outside, with deep hardwood floors, high ceilings, and a grand staircase to the right of the front entrance. Through an archway to the left Clarke entered the living room, which had an impressive woodburning fireplace, plush furnishings in neutral tones and the softest looking rug she had ever seen. From the living room Clarke could see Lexa in the open concept kitchen, with its stainless-steel appliances, skirt sink and intricate light fixtures. After Basil was happily munching from his bowl beside the fridge, Lexa found her way over to Clarke, spooking her as she admired the pictures on the walls. 

“Thats my mother, she passed away when I was 6. That’s the only picture I have of her,” She said as she came to stand beside Clarke. 

Feeling a pang of sadness Clarke looks over to see Lexa compose her expression and smile, “It was a long time ago. Come on, I'll start dinner if you want to pour the wine,” Lexa says, leading Clarke to the Kitchen island. 

She perches on a stool as Lexa forages for a bottle of wine in the small wine cooler under the counter. After a few minutes she seems to find what she’s looking for and retrieves two crystal glasses from the cupboard. With a smile she sets the wine and glasses down in front of Clarke and begins to prepare dinner, Clarke pouring two glasses of the red wine. After some chitchat Lexa’s cooking begins to smell really good and she realizes just how hungry she really is. Her stomach gives a growl and the other woman chuckles. 

“not long now, don’t worry. I'll get the plates. We can eat right here at the island,” Lexa says as she begins to set up the meal. 

When they are finished eating Clarke lets out a sigh, “Wow, Lexa. I haven't had a meal like that in, I don’t know how long. Raven and I are notorious for our junk food and take out. That was great.” taking a deep drink of her wine she can’t believe how good of a dinner she just had. 

“I like to cook when I have time, it relaxes me. I find it more of a fun activity than work. But I’m going to be honest, I impressed myself tonight with that salmon,” she gives a cheeky smile and a laugh while getting up and taking their dishes to the dish washer. “How about we take some wine and go sit out by the fire pit, would you be ok with that?” Lexa asks.

Standing up and giving a light stretch, Clarke nods her agreement. “That sounds like it would be nice.”

Outside in the backyard, sitting side by side on a bench made out of logs, the women drank their wine and talked while Basil busied himself with a chew toy across the fire from them. It was dark now and the only light was coming from the fire and the glow of the light on the back porch of  lexas house, on the other side of the yard. Clarke realized she was beginning to feel tipsy and talking more than she normally would. Little did she know Lexa was feeling the same way, the wine  really helping them get to know  each other . As Lexa saw Clarke give a small shiver, she grabbed a blanket from the bench beside her and covered them both up.

“Thanks, I thought I’d be warm enough with my Jacket, guess I misjudged that,” she says, scooting closer to Lexa to get more of the blanket. 

“I expected that, most people do. Not everyone spends any real time outside in the country at night. It gets colder than in the city.” Lexa says softly, with a smile. 

After another hour and another two glasses of wine, the women make their way back into the house. Little to no strangeness lingers between them with help from the wine and the time spent talking, so Clarke makes her way over to the  living room and sits down on the soft rug in front of the fire place. Lexa comes over with a fresh bottle of wine and builds a fire for them, then takes a seat beside Clarke on the rug. Neither of them speaks for a few minutes, they just sit in comfortable silence, watching the flames of the indoor fire and sipping their wine. 

By the time Clarke checks her phone and sees the time its 1:00am. Her and Lexa talked about passed relationships, work, friends and family. She told her about Finn, and in return was told about Costia, Lexa’s girlfriend that died two years ago. As it got later and later, they got closer and closer to each other, seated on the floor in front of the fireplace. Lexa grabs pillows and blankets off of the couch closest to her and makes a comfortable nest, laying down. Clarke sits watching the fire, chin resting on her knees, head tilted to the side. 

“I know I’m stating the obvious, but you’re more than welcome to spend the night here. It’s already so late. I just wanted to make sure you knew that,” says Lexa as she rolls onto her side, facing Clarke. 

“Thanks, I was thinking of making my way home  but..yeah , it might be a good idea to stay the night,” she says and turns her head to face Lexa, green eyes glowing in the firelight. 

“Would you like me to make up the spare room? I can have it done in a few minutes,” Lexa replies, taking a drink and emptying her wineglass.

“To be honest, if  it's not too weird, I'd like to sleep right here. In front of the fire, it's so nice,”

“No, that’s not weird at all. I’ve done it more than I can admit,”

Clarke lays down on her side, facing Lexa. Cozy and warm, she gets comfortable but doesn’t take her eyes off of the woman in front of her. She feels butterflies in her stomach, and a comfortability she rarely feels. As Clarke watches, Lexa leans in and places a slow and gentle kiss on her lips. Her cheeks grow warm, and shyness creeps in, but she fights it off and kisses her back. Slowly, gently. Neither woman needs to speak to know that they both feel they need this. This connection to another person, the closeness. 

After a few minutes Lexa pulls Clarke on top of her, and lets her hands explore the curves of her body as their kissing deepens. Clarke sits back, straddling Lexa and pulls her sweater over her head as Lexas’ hands move up to unhook her bra. Letting her hands explore Clarkes upper half, she rises to meet her and give her a heated kiss. Their movements speeding up, Clarke inches Lexas’ shirt over her head and runs her hands down her abdomen, feeling the toned yet highly feminine body of this gorgeous woman. 

As things get more heated, Lexa takes one of Clarkes nipples into her mouth, while fondling the other breast with her hand. Clarke lets out a moan and pulls Lexas’ mouth up to hers, kissing her deeply, allowing her to nibble at her bottom lip. With an arm snaked around Clarkes waist, Lexa flips them over pinning Clarke under her. She removes her own bra and tosses it to the side, not caring where her clothes end up. As she returns to kissing Clarke, she presses a thigh between her legs, and Clarke begins a steady motion, reveling in the friction. Lexa moves her hips forward, adding pressure between both of their legs, and a shudder  ripples through her. 

As Lexa kisses Clarke, she moves slowly down her jaw to her neck and bites, biting harder when she hears a moan escape her lips. She continues kissing down to her chest, alternating between small bites, sucking and licking as she makes her way to Clarkes’ breasts. Letting her hand travel lower and lower, she reaches the waistband of Clarkes jeans, and looks up into her eyes for permission. With a small nod, Clarke pants and undoes her buttons herself, as Lexa slips her hand inside, feeling the wetness pooling at Clarkes' center. She moves small circles over Clarkes’ clit, as she sucks on her nipples, alternating breasts.

Between moans, Clarke raises her hips and starts removing her pants. Getting the hint, Lexa assists and strips Clarke of her remaining clothing. Once no more clothing is in the way, Lexa positions herself between Clarkes’ legs, and gives a long full lick, tasting her and winning a loud moan from her as her hand flies to  Lexas ’ hair. With this as encouragement Lexa continues, licking and sucking Clarkes’ clit and being rewarded with more moans, her hips grinding for more contact. As tension builds, Lexa slides a finger inside of Clarke, and adds another, pumping and flexing her fingers as she flicks Clarke's clit with her tongue. After adding a third finger, Lexa feels Clarke tighten around her as she cries out, her  entire body tensing as she comes, gripping  Lexas ’ hair in one hand and one of her breasts in the other. Once her body relaxes, Lexa slowly removes her fingers and slides up Clarkes' body to kiss her, letting her taste herself on her lips. 

“I needed that,” Clarke says, still trying to catch her breath. As Lexa lays down on her back beside her, she turns onto her side and grabs Lexas’ face, kissing her hard. 

“Me too,” Lexa says between kisses. 

Clarke nestles in to Lexa, face in her neck and arm across her middle. It doesn’t take long for them both to fall asleep next to the dying fire, curled up into each other. 


	3. I know it turns you off when I get talking like a teen.

Birds. That’s what she hears, birds chirping. But it doesn’t sound soothing, it’s making her head ache. When Clarke first opens her eyes, she's disoriented, looking around the strange room. She gives her head a shake and the night before comes flooding back to her. She looks around and sees Lexa, still asleep beside her on the carpet in front of the now cold fireplace. She smiles and gives a big stretch, kicking something warm and furry at their feet. Basil. At that Lexa begins to stir, groaning as she stretches. She turns to face Clarke, one eye still closed and her hair a mess around her. 

“Goodmorning,” she says as Clarke chuckles at her. 

“Morning. I think I’m hungover, how do you feel?” 

“Right as rain, if rain were hail the size of golf balls landing directly on my head.” 

“Well, I’m glad I’m not the only one then,” Clarke says as she sits up, holding her head and stomach. 

After many yawns and stretches, the two get up from the floor and begin putting the living room back together. Lexa makes for the back door with the pile of empty wine bottles, Basil trotting along at her side. As Clarke moves around more and more her hangover intensifies, the nausea getting almost unbearable. Finally, after the mess of their drunken night is cleaned up, Clarke breaks for the main floor powder room. She makes it to the toilet just in time as she begins to vomit, emptying what wine and dinner remain in her stomach from the night before. The vomiting makes her head throb, and she lets out a whine, Sitting beside the toilet on the cold tile floor. She can hear footsteps then light knocks on the bathroom door. 

“Hey, are you alright? Hangover get the best of you?” Lexa asks through the door. “I think the best cure for that is take out, water and Advil,” 

Clarke dry heaves at the thought of food, but manages a weak, “I’m fine,” in response. 

After another 10 minutes spent on the bathroom floor with her head in the toilet bowl, Clarke manages to make her way to the kitchen where Lexa has placed a glass of ice water and a bottle of Advil. After getting down as much water as she dared and 2 gel caps, Clarke looks around for Lexa, who is nowhere to be found. After 5 minutes of sitting at the kitchen island, head in her hands, Clarke hears her come into the room. She turns and sees her, in fresh clothes, hair fixed into a half updo, braided back in a fishtail. How can she look so good after such a long night of drinking, she thinks to herself. 

“I just have to let Basil back in and give him his breakfast and then we can go into town and find ours, are you feeling any better?” Lexa moves to the back door and calls for Basil as he comes trotting in. 

“A little bit, I’m hoping food helps that’s for sure,” says Clarke as she stands, ready to leave. 

The ride into town isn't a very upbeat one, with Clarke feeling so terrible, but she does enjoy the time with Lexa. They listen to the radio on low and keep the windows cracked so that she can get the fresh air. After a while Clarke leans her head against the window and drifts off, only waking once in the drive through of a fast-food restaurant. 

“hey sleepyhead, what would you like? I’m getting a bacon and egg breakfast sandwich,” Lexa rolls down her window, ready to place their order. 

Clarke asks for the same with a coffee, hoping it will right her hangover and she will begin to feel semi human. After getting their food Lexa pulls into the far side of the parking lot, turning off the engine. After dividing up the order and getting down as much food as she possibly can, Clarke begins to regain some energy and life and Lexa pulls the car out and heads in the direction of Clarkes apartment. 

“I had a really good time last night, though I’m sorry you’re so sick today,” Lexa says as she pulls up to Clarkes front door. 

“I did too, totally worth the hangover,” with a smile Clarke opens her car door and climbs out. “I hope we can do it again some time,” 

“I’d really like that. I hope you feel better, I’ll send you a text later on. See ya” pulling out of the driveway Lexa tosses Clarke a smile and waves before she's out of sight. 

“Well, there she is! How was it? Oh, you look like crap,” Raven says as she enters the living room of their apartment sprawled out on the couch watching tv, her usual downtime activity. 

Clarke scoffs, “Thanks. It was actually really great, but I drank way too much wine and I can’t remember a time when I had a hangover as awful as this. I'm going to try and sleep it off, wake me up around 5 if you’re home?” 

“Sure thing, but then I want all the details. Hey, maybe shower and brush your teeth, I can smell you from here,” 

Clarke flips raven off on her way up the stairs to her bedroom where she strips and climbs into bed, not having energy for much else. 

After sleeping for what feels like days Clarke is woken up by another fit of vomiting. She has just enough time to grab the garbage can beside her bed before she's heaving, bringing up the breakfast and coffee she managed to eat. Not bothering to check the time she rolls back over and falls back asleep, staying that way until she hears Raven talking to her from the foot of her bed. 

“Hey, Griff, its 5. it stinks in here, whoa,” scrunching up her face she makes her way over the bedroom window and tosses it open, letting in the fresh air. “Are you getting up? I can order something for supper. Pizza? Burgers? Your choice,” 

Clarke rolls over in bed to face raven, moaning as she turns. “to be honest, none of that sounds any good at all. I’ll take soup from somewhere though,” 

As Raven goes back downstairs to order their meals, Clarke puts on her robe and makes her way into the bathroom to shower. Still being exhausted she spends most of her time sitting on the bottom of the tub letting the water fall over her. After more heaving she manages to get clean and brush her teeth, using up what little energy she has. It takes longer than usual for her to towel off and slide on a pair of sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt, but once she has, she trudges downstairs to see raven setting up their takeout orders on the coffee table. 

“There we go, at least now you smell a hell of a lot better even if you don’t look it. I got you chicken rice soup from Gerald’s, I figured their menu was diverse enough for both of us today,” Raven says, handing Clarke a spoon and the soup. “Now, details. Don’t skimp out on me,” 

Getting comfortable and starting in on her dinner, Clarke tells raven about her night with Lexa. She tells her about Basil the dog, the wine, the great meal, and about sleeping with her, omitting the dirtier details of that particular subject. Sharing the story with her best friend is something she normally wouldn’t have an issue with, but for some reason she feels awkward and wrong sharing all of these details, like somehow her time with Lexa is more private than her other encounters have been. 

“Well, it sounds like you had a good time. Was she any good?” Raven teases as they clean up their dinner mess and park themselves back in front of the T.V 

“Shut up. Yes, I had a good time,” Clarke retorts while pulling a blanket over herself as she surfs through the Netflix menu. “What are we in the mood for? I’m finally feeling human, dinner seemed to help,” 

The two best friends settle on watching a horror tv series and snuggle in on the couches, chit chatting and joking around at the jump scares and awful sound track. After finishing the fourth episode, Raven looks over to see Clarke fast asleep with the blankets pulled high around her face. She turns off the tv and the lamps and heads to bed, being quiet as to not disturb the sleeping blonde. 

Clarke is woken up by an extreme wave of nausea, causing her to dart from the couch to the kitchen garbage pail. After emptying the contents of her stomach into the bin she grabs her phone from the coffee table to check the time. 3:45am. She sees a missed text from Lexa. 

Lexa: Hope you’re feeling better and got some rest, I’ll give you a shout this week. I’m going out of town on some business for a few days, take care. 

Clarke: Hey, I’m hanging in there, safe to say I’m off wine for a while. Hope you have a good trip. 

Grabbing a glass of water and making her way up stairs to her bedroom, Clarke feels exhausted. Her headache has returned and her stomach is still upset, this is one hangover she won't soon forget. She strips off her clothes and crawls into bed, not bothering to find pajamas. Thank god she doesn’t work tomorrow she thinks as she drifts off to sleep. 

The next few days carry on the same way, wake up, get sick, eat, sleep, wake up get sick, eat sleep. She misses 3 days of work when she finally agrees with Raven that she should see a doctor, and that its more likely a flu than a hangover. After calling the clinic and scheduling an appointment for that afternoon, she calls her mom to ask for a ride. 

“Hey mom, would you be able to give me a ride to the clinic this afternoon? I have an appointment at 3:30” 

Through the phone Abby's concern is obvious, “Yes of course, I have to go in and check some files anyways. I’ll stop and pick you up on my way. I’m glad you’re finally going in, it’s likely a virus and you don’t want to get dehydrated. I’ll be at your house at 10 after 3,” 

“Thanks mom, see you then,” Clarke says before hanging up the phone. 

2 hours until her appointment, she lays on the couch until she absolutely has to get dressed and even then, she only tosses on some sweats and flops back on the couch until she sees that it’s 3:10. Grabbing her bag and her jacket she makes her way outside just as Abby pulls in, giving her daughter a wave through the window. Clarke climbs in and the two are quickly on their way to the clinic. 

“I’ll be up in my office when you’re done if you want me to run you home, just come and find me ok? Love you.” Abby says as she gets into the elevator in the clinic waiting room. 

“Thanks mom, I will. Love you too,” 

She doesn’t have to wait long, in less than five minutes the nurse is calling her name and bringing her to an exam room where she takes her vitals and weight. 

“Your blood pressure is a little elevated but I don’t think that’s anything to worry about. Are you having any other symptoms other than the nausea and headache?” asks the nurse as she writes in Clarkes chart. 

“i’ve been feeling exhausted but other than that, no nothing that I can think of,” 

Looking over her clip board the nurse asks, “Is there any possibility that you could be pregnant? Have you missed your cycle?” 

“I don’t think so, my cycles are always irregular,” Clarke tries thinking back to the last time she and Finn slept together, were they careful? They usually were. 

“Well, lets do a test just so we can rule that out. Here, take this into the bathroom with you and when you’re finished place it inside of the small metal cabinet, someone will collect it from there,” 

After giving her urine sample, Clarke only has to wait a few short minutes until the familiar doctor comes into the exam room, giving her a smile. She has known Dr.Jackson for years, he actually trained under her mother for a time. 

“Hey there Clarke, it seems you’re feeling pretty terrible doesn’t it. How long have you been feeling this way?” He asks, reading through her chart. 

“About 5 days now, it started out as a hangover and never went away.” She says from her seat on the exam table. 

“Well why don’t we have you lie down and I’ll do a physical exam of your abdomen, and by the time we’re done the nurse should be back with your test results,” 

Clarke puts her feet up and stretches out across the exam table, lifting her shirt to expose her stomach and Jackson pushes here and there, asking if this is tender, or if that causes any discomfort. Just as he finishes and she sits up the nurse knocks on the door and walks in, handing Jackson a sheet of paper and closing the door again. 

“Well, according to the urine test, you’re pregnant Clarke,” He says with a stitch between his eyebrows. 

Clarke is shocked, unable to form any thought that makes sense. She just stares at Jackson like he has three heads. “Uh, are you sure?” 

“Let's take a blood sample just to be extra sure, but urine tests these days are extremely accurate,” 

After the blood sample is taken the nurse tells her that she will hear from them within a few days to confirm her results. She thanks the nurse and walks out, opting to walk home even if she feels terrible. She can’t face her mother right now; she honestly doesn’t feel like she can face anyone at all at this moment. The walk home takes about an hour and the autumn weather feels good on her cheeks, the chill not bothering her but rather helping to calm her stomach and her racing mind. By the time she gets home Raven is already there, butt parked in her usual spot on the couch. 

“Hey, how did it go?” she asks as Clarke walks in and takes off her jacket and boots. 

“Oh fine, just some kind of flu bug. Stay hydrated and it should pass, yada yada. I’m going to watch some tv in bed,” Clarke doesn’t wait for Ravens reply as she makes her way up the stairs to her bedroom, locking the door behind her.


	4. I like to hurry when I'm wanting you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus. Some not great things came up and writing got tossed to the back burner. Here's a very short and choppy chapter to help fill the gap. A bigger and better update to come! xx; 
> 
> *Not edited, will go back and edit when time permits*

Two more days pass as she avoids everyone she can, opting to stay in bed rather than face her mother or best friend. She tells them she simply hasn’t gotten over her stomach bug and would rather spend her time in her room recovering. The nausea still comes daily but she manages to keep some food down in the afternoons, making sure to stay hydrated as she figures out exactly what she wants to do. Can I handle a baby right now? she asks herself Friday morning as she sits in the bath. Her cell phone ringing pulls her out of her thoughts and she grabs it off of her towel on the floor. 

“Hi Clarke, this is Nancy from the clinic, we got the results from your blood work and they confirm what the urine test said. You are indeed pregnant. We would like to set up a dating ultrasound for you early next week, are you free Tuesday at 1:00?” 

Clarke confirms the appointment and tosses her phone back on the towel, sinking lower into the bath. Well, there it is, she thinks trying to stay calm. 

After her bath, Clarke dresses and heads out for a walk in the cool autumn air, trying to walk off her anxieties and get a grasp on her thoughts. She walks until she nears the city shopping mall, heading in to grab a coffee and take the chill off. On her way to the one coffee shop in the entire mall, she passes a store selling baby items. Pausing at the display window she looks at the scene set up in front of her; a mannequin with a rounded belly pushing a jogging stroller with a toddler sized mannequin tucked inside. Taking a deep breath and holding it, she wanders into the store. Looking around at the clothing, strollers and other various baby items she finds her way to the back of the store, to a section of maternity clothing hung on racks. She takes in the jeans with the elastic waist bands, the flowing tops and nursing bras and feels an overwhelming urge to run, to dart out of the store as fast as she possibly can, but just before she can do exactly that she spots a tiny stuffed elephant, almost exactly the same as the one she had as a child. It had been a gift from her father before he passed away and she cherished it more than anything. To this day every time she went to her mothers’ house she would go up to her old room and snuggle it on her old childhood bed. 

After purchasing the elephant and leaving the store, she knew what her choice was. It had not been a very hard choice to make, when it all came down to it. She was not a child, she was 25 years old and supported herself, even if she didn’t own her own home or vehicle just yet. She made her choice and now it was just time to find a way to let her family and friends know. 

Making her way back home, coffee in hand, Clarke feels her phone vibrate, signaling a text coming in. 

Lexa: Hey, I’m back in town, would you maybe want to go for dinner tomorrow? 

Clarke: Hi, yeah that sounds good to me. Hope your trip went well! 

Lexa: Great, I'll pick you up at 6:00. I’ll fill you in on the details of my trip then. 

Crap, she thinks looking down at Lexas’ name, there goes that. It's common knowledge that lesbian relationships tend to move quicker than others, however, Clarke sure as hell knew that anyone just starting to get to know someone would be scared off by news of a pregnancy. This was something she would not let Lexa on to, at least not until after the dating ultrasound in the next few days. 

As Clarke walks inside her front door she's greeted by laughing and loud conversation, the familiar voices coming from the kitchen. After tossing her boots to the side and rounding the corner, she sees her friends John Murphy, his girlfriend Emori, and Raven sitting at the kitchen table playing a game of cards. 

“And she lives!” Shouts Murphy, spotting Clarke before anyone else. “I heard you were dead to the word, down with the flu. We almost didn’t come by, that’s not something I want to catch,” a crooked smile on his face 

After playing her hand, Emori looks up from her cards saying, "We figured it was safe since Raven seemed to be able to avoid it. For now, at least,” 

“I think you’re fine guys, I’m feeling much better today. What’s up?” Clarke sits at the table with her friends, sneaking a peak at Ravens cards. 

“Well, before this highly entertaining game,” Raven says with an eye roll, “Murphy was telling me about a party him and Emori are going to tomorrow night. I think, if you’re feeling up to it, you should come. It sounds like fun. Monty and Harper will be there, he’s sure to bring some of his homemade moonshine. And Echo will be there too.” 

“Come on Clarke, it’s been months since we’ve all been able to get together. Come be a stupid young person for a night,” Murphy pleads, 

“Well, maybe. I’m actually meeting someone for dinner tomorrow night. But we’ll see how it goes. Where is it?” 

“It’s at this guys’ place that Echo has been seeing for a few months, Bellamy something. He lives across town,” Emori says, getting up to pour a coffee from the pot on the counter. 

“Clarke, if you don’t want to drink at least come hang out, you can DD for us,” Leaning back and stretching in her chair Raven gives Clarke a pleading look. “Don’t be a downer, Griff,” 

“Fine, I'll see what I can do, I’ll let you know tomorrow. No promises,” 

After spending the day with Raven, Murphy, and Emori, Clarke sits in bed with her laptop in front of her, reading pregnancy articles. By 10:30pm she’s exhausted and overloaded with information that does little to help her anxiety. Flipping her laptop closed and pulling the covers up, Clarke falls into a fitful and dream filled sleep.


End file.
